Sunday, February 08, 2004

No more reasons

Honestly. I don't have anymore. I haven't had this feeling in the pit of my tummy for ages. I'm enjoying it. This utter sense of calm. For once, a moment I can enjoy wholly... until tomorrow comes that is.

So you've given me a reason to grin at life and realise how silly it all really is. Yes, I know... I shouldn't analyse it all but it's a habit I can't break but to be quite frank (You be Bob) I enjoy it. I like having a reason, a title, a meaning to everything. I can't be satisfied with just following. I don't enjoy being sheep and I don't think you do either. So cut the macho act hun. -smile-

And even when we're in a position to be funny, we end up talking. What's up with that? But honestly, I do enjoy that a lot more than just being humurous. I enjoy the random, reasonless affection and I enjoy arguing with you. Especially after yesterday. Finally. I see the real you and I hear the real you and I'm not offended. I doubt I can be. With the lack of emotional attachment to what we have, and after hearing the truth, it makes it more clear that I love your company so much and still I can't imagine myself being with you. Once again, my head has been pulled out from the clouds and placed squarely and neatly on my shoulders and no lower.

It's amazing the people you stumble across in life. How they can change you and affect you and they don't even need to know it.

You amuse me, thoroughly. You make me more apparent. I'm learning about myself. I'm learning to love myself. No offence to you of course. You're wonderful as you are and that's just you. Don't you love acceptance? I feel no need to change you, but I feel this responsibility to educate you on my ways and beliefs. At the same time, I want you to remain exactly who you are. And I think this is just the classic example why.

"How are you feeling? Tell me your dreams, your whims, your fancies."

"...my dreams, to be financially free by thirty. Whims, doubt I['d] indulge in it. Fancy owning a castle."


Excuse me as I gush on your mad appeal. A castle. Fancy that. -beam-

::me:: at 10:57